Psychic Octopus Blamed For Recent Economic Woes In Kazakhstan

never before in the history of mankind, has a cephalopod delighted and enraged an entire country. Paul, The Octopus, had his own segment on German TV, during the World Cup, where he picked each of the national team’s matches. two crates were dropped in his tank, each one containing his favourite food (mussels), and each one draped in the flag of either Germany or their opponent.

he picked every game correctly in the group stage, and began drawing worldwide attention, after picking Germany over England in the second round. the honeymoon was over 1.5 weeks later, when Paul had the audacity (or some would say foresight) to pick Spain over Germany in the semi-finals. he went on to pick Spain over Holland in the final, and finished with a record of 8-0. German fans gained a small measure of solace when Paul picked Germany over Uruguay, in the third-placed game.

no sooner had Spain raised the trophy, than Paul was immortalized on his own shirt, which I just had to buy! it reads “Pablo, el Pulpo, Acerto de Nuevo, Viva Espana!” which basically translates to “Paul, The Octopus, does it again. Long live Spain!” sure to be the most fuckin’ stylish non-musician oriented shirt I’ve bought since that time I bought Jim Tozzi’s X:RA “The Biz” shirt a little over a year ago.

oh yeah, and referring back to the headline, while doing research for this article, I found a story about how Kazakh bookmakers were blaming Paul, b/c too many gamblers were following his picks, LOL! don’t blame me, Borat,! I put all my money in before the tournament started. anywho, you can read the article here

Paul has been retired from making World Cup predictions, and now plans to go back to his previous occupation, working in live-action Japanese tentacle porn.

Paul

shirt

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