Man Who Thought He Was In New York, Was Actually In Pennsylvania

I went to my best male mate’s house on Friday nite to check out his impressive collection of plastic storage bins. in my best Chief Wiggum impression, I said “that’s some mighty fine binnin!” he called himself Binnin Laden. we thought that would be a great idea for an [adult swim] show. he told me about their recent trip to New Jersey, where they watched a whole bunch of Xavier: Renegade Angel episodes…NICE-NICE-NICE

Xavier

Wrath: we went to New Jersey, and then New York.
Persie: cool, what part did u go to?
Wrath: we were in the Poconos
Persie: the Poconos are in Pennsylvania
Wrath: we were in Pennsylvania?
Storm: yeah, I’m not surprised u don’t remember.

now that’s what we in The Biz call comedy gold!!!

on our way back from the Two Kids show, we stopped by 7-11, where I bought a Drumstick ice cream cone. I didn’t want to eat it in my friend’s car, b/c I’m a sloppy eater. I figured it would be ok if I waited until we got back. it was starting to melt, and the cone was going soft. this was an epic struggle that required me to finish eating it in the bathroom. disaster had been averted, and spillage had been kept to a bare minimum, with a proper clean-up that followed. as the nite came to a close, Oranjello put on another world-class kneading display. when he’s in his zone, it’s an absolute pleasure to watch.

I went to Rockville on Saturday nite for a birthday party. it took all of about 5 minutes to remind me why I hate riding metro. I had $15 on a fare card that was deemed unusable b/c it was too bent. I asked the guy at the station, if I could exchange the card for cash, so that I could buy a new ticket. of course, he said no. this minor inconvenience caused me to miss my train, and I had to wait for another 15 minutes for the next one to arrive. tho I will say it was a quicker trip (even with some track maintenance issues) than when I went out there on a Monday during rush hour a few weeks ago.

I had a Curb Your Enthusiasm moment at the restaurant, b/c I was unhappy with the seating arrangements. 80% of the guests were speaking Polish, and outside of the couple who were hosting the get-together, I knew all of about two other ppl. I spent most of my time attempting to make small-talk, and drinking shots of Crown Royal. I worked a lot on my Peter Steele impression. towards the latter part of the evening, a group of four women got a table close to ours. every now and then, I would catch quick glimpses, watching them as they dined. I wasn’t sure if they were lesbians, but for the purposes of my own amusement, they were.

I had a meeting at work on Sunday morning at 8 AM, which I would’ve skipped, if they hadn’t scheduled me to work from 11-6. the only thing I got out of it, is that neither my manager nor supervisor have bothered to learn my name. it didn’t bother me, b/c I was still extremely toxic from the previous nite’s binge. I was working on three hours of sleep, so I didn’t have the energy to try out any new material. occasionally, I would stumble over my words, but otherwise, it was a fairly uneventful day.

I hope to have a recap of my annual work performance review up in the next coupla weeks…

Carl

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