Carl At The Movies: Silver Linings Playbook (2012)

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imdb native rating: 7.9
Carl’s score: 8.3

CAST:
Jennifer Lawrence (The Hunger Games) won an Academy Award for Best Actress, for her portrayal of Tiffany, a slut who preys on the insecurities of escaped mental patients, by secretly posing as their estranged wives, enticing them with the prospect of reconciliation, in exchange for their participation in some kind of bizarre dance competition.

Bradley Cooper (The Hangover) is Pat, a former teacher who goes mental after catching his wife cheating on him. upon his release from the loony bin, he moves in with his parents. his hobbies include pining for his whore wife and wearing a trash bag in public.

Robert De Niro in his best role since that movie where he played a good fella, I think it was called Those Mafia Guys Who Talked With The Thick New York Accents. he plays Pat’s father, an Eagles fan, whose best friend is a Cowboys fan?!? he’s extremely superstitious and makes his money gambling on football.

Jacki Weaver as Pat’s mom, Delores. just like any good woman, she excels in the kitchen.

Anupam Kher as Pat’s psychiatrist, Dr. Cliff Patel. he’s a fellow Eagles fan, who gets off on tormenting Pat, by playing his wedding song during their visits.

Chris Tucker (Rush Hour) as Pat’s friend, Danny. he’s also an escaped mental patient who teaches Pat and Tiffany how to dance.

Julia Stiles (The Bourne movies) as Tiffany’s MILFy older sister, Veronica.

John Ortiz as Veronica’s husband, Ronnie. he likes Pat’s DeSean Jackson jersey, and breaking stuff in the garage, while listening to bands like Metallica and Megadeth.

SYNOPSIS:
this is your typical love story about a guy who pretends to be interested in something one girl is interested in, while trying to get with another girl, at the same time.

apparently, as long as you don’t bring up Stevie Wonder, everything’s cool. I had a similar situation every time I would hear REO Speedwagon.

ballroom dancing is one of the dumbest things you could do, and should only be attempted, if entrance to the bone zone is imminent.

as a self-respecting New Yorker, I don’t know how De Niro could even pretend to be an Eagles fan, so for that alone, he deserves an Academy Award. the Eagles friggin’ suck, end of story!

it’s a shame the dinner scene at Veronica’s house didn’t turn into some sort of incestuous wifeswap scenario, but I guess they had to cut it due to time constraints.

to all the women who refused to have sex with me, b/c I insisted on wearing my Phil Simms Super Bowl XXI replica jersey, I say, who’s the real asshole here?!?

MORAL OF THE STORY: BITCHES BE CRAZY!!!

Silver_Linings_Playbook_Poster

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One Response to “Carl At The Movies: Silver Linings Playbook (2012)”

  1. ClintJCL@gmail.com Says:

    sounds interesting, but i’ll probably never watch it because of the football theme! if that is the sport…

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