teenage heartthrob, pop music icon, Canadien, and noted hockey fan, Justin Bieber, upped the ante in his ongoing feud with the NHL, when he ejaculated on the Boston Bruins mascot, during a sold-out performance at the TD Garden on Saturday nite. the feud began innocently enough, when he was photographed standing on the Chicago Blackhawks logo, following a performance at the United Center, two weeks ago.
in a press release shortly thereafter, Bieber explained “I was just trying to take a picture of the Stanley Cup, yo! I’m a big fan of that sport where they skate around trying to whack a puck into a net. does Wayne Gretzky still play?”
in preparation of Bieber’s performance, the Bruins roped off the logo in their locker room. feeling disrespected, Bieber came out for his show, in a Toronto Maple Leafs jersey. he dedicated 20 minutes of his set to educating the audience about the plight of Edward Snowden, appealing to the Obama administration to be lenient on him, while exercising caution not to strain already tense relations with Russia.
it was during the singing portion of his show that things got out of hand. following his hit song “Gurl, Oh, Gurl! (Tweeting @ UR Balloon Knot)” Bieber went into a diatribe about how the Bruins choked in the Stanley Cup Finals last month. to show that he was the bigger man, he invited Blades, the Bruins mascot up on stage to squash any animosity there might have been between the organization and himself. after vowing not to step on the Bruins locker room logo, he unzipped his pants, and proceeded to ejaculate all over Blades. several audience members noted the consistency and thickness of his load.
“it looked like he had been playing with himself for several hours before the show.” said one concertgoer, who wished to remain anonymous. “u know how it is, when u bring yourself to cum several times, but never do. it’s like the dude was blue-ballin’ himself or sumpin’! eventually, u just knew he was going to explode all over somebody’s face-face-face.”
no word yet on what Bieber has planned for his hometown Leafs, when his world tour rolls into Toronto on Thursday nite…