Archive for the ‘television’ Category

Local Man Begrudgingly Agrees To Watch Mike Tyson Mysteries

February 23, 2015

due to inclement weather last weekend, I was unable to attend my friend’s birthday party. they had a smaller gathering on Friday nite, which consisted exclusively of watching shows.

Venture Bros. – I’ve only seen a handful of eps, so I’m not familiar with characters or storylines. this particular episode dealt with the commandeering of a space station.

Mr. Pickles – after a night of heavy drinking (facilitated by Mr. Pickles), Grandpa wakes up to find himself hitched to Crazy Linda, and goes about trying to annul the marriage. Tommy enlists the help of the local mutants, as he tries to become a wrestler.

we watched two eps. of Adventure Time. in the first one, Finn enlists in the ant army in exchange for some dental work. the dentist sounded like Lucy Lawless, but she didn’t appear in the credits. further research on imdb confirmed it was her tho. maybe she was omitted from the show credits due to some SAG Union technicality. the other episode was Finn and Jake-free, as the plot centered around the Flame Princess enlisting the help of Princess Bubblegum, to figure out why her kingdom is cooling down. there’s a thinly-veiled commentary about the US involvement in the Middle East, if you read between the lines.

we watched three eps. of the Eric Andre Show. this is the best thing on television, hands down!

Hannibal checks Jimmy Kimmel for lice; Tyler, the Creator, rocks out to 3-11. Tyler’s father also makes a surprise appearance. Health performs while cooking health food. 3-11 was a callback from earlier in the episode, when someone hijacked Eric’s monologue claiming 9-11 was an inside job. this made me think of the old Neil Hamburger joke “what’s worse than 9-11? 3-11!”

everyone gets their own understudy, including guest, Pauly D. Andy Samberg plays Eric’s. Eric and Hannibal take turns beating up Rick Springfield. Paul Wall reads excerpts from James and the Giant Peach

Bird Up! is shown to a focus group. Chris Rock makes a cameo appearance. Hannibal promotes Snail Down. as has been the custom with previous season finales, this episode was a bit more chaotic than usual.

there were some hilarious “man on the street” bits which delicately blurred the line between scripted and organic including a woman tripping down the stairs while Eric is arguing with a woman he has stuffed inside a suitcase. a woman is so freaked out by Bird Up! that she leaves her toddler daughter behind. Eric is confronted by a scorned ex-lover in a diner, and after hurling several obscenities at him, she dumps a bag of her own feces on him. there’s also a segment where Eric impersonates a postal worker on the subway, and one where Eric and Hannibal (dressed as a cop) destroy a police car. I’m sure they’ve got a shitload of footage from these shoots that will never make the air, but I’d love to see what they had to leave out.

I had to leave during an episode of Mike Tyson Mysteries. I saw a billboard for this show on the subway a few weeks ago. it’s got that 70s animation style to it with a Scooby-Doo vibe. plus, it’s got Norm McDonald as the voice of an alcoholic pigeon. definitely worth checking out!

Hot Tub Time Machine 2 has gotten some abysmal reviews. the lack of John Cusack sounds like a dealbreaker. I liked the first one, so maybe I’ll give it a go when it hits netflix. a coupla friends of mine saw it, and didn’t seem to care for it, but their seats were recliners, so at least they were comfortable.

I like Jon Benjamin! I like Archer, I liked his turn as Master Shake on the live action Aqua Teen. hell, I even liked Jon Benjamin Has A Van. but, I draw the line at Bob’s Burgers. I realize part of his schtick is his dry monotone delivery, but it just doesn’t work on this show. the kids are annoying (I also like Kristen Schaal and Eugene Mirman) and the wife’s voice is grating after a few minutes. on top of that, I don’t find any of the storylines particularly interesting, either. other than FOX’s proclivity toward animated shows, I don’t know why this show is still on the air. I’m done with my rant. until next time, inferwebz…


Mobile Housing Community Lads: Season 8

January 14, 2015

after a seven year-hiatus, Netflix has resurrected another cult tv classic, in the form of Trailer Park Boys. the story of three lifelong friends who are petty criminals that live in Sunnyvale Trailer Park in Nova Scotia…CANADA! this show is shot in the mockumentary “let’s cut away to talk to the camera” style that seems to be all the rage these days.

there’s Julian, who’s the brains behind the operations, and always has the best interests of the trailer park in mind, even tho his best laid schemes eventually come undone. he is best known for always having a drink in his hand. there’s Ricky, who reminds me of a cross between Seth Rogen and John Candy. he’s not the sharpest pudding in the fannie pack, and is often times drunk and/or stoned. and finally there’s Bubbles, who exhibits the most common sense of the group, but ends up getting caught up in the schemes one way or another. he’s one part rain man and one part paranoid neurotic, who likes kittens and wears glasses so thick, you could probably fry an ant with them.

for the first six seasons, the boys were joined by bumbling stooges, Cory and Trevor. Trevor left after season 6, due to a pay dispute, but Cory returned after missing season 7. Philadelphia “Phil” Collins son, Jacob, replaced Trevor in season 7. fans of the show will be happy to know that everyone who was a cast regular has come back, including the disembodied voice who is often heard yelling obscenities from off-camera at the boys whenever something is afoot. sadly Phil Collins and “Shitty” Bill both passed away in 2013.

the main antagonists are Jim Lahey, an ex-cop turned alcoholic who runs Sunnyvale along with his on-again off-again boyfriend/assistant Randy, who likes cheeseburgers and never wears a shirt. every season begins and ends the same, with the boys coming up with a get rich quick scheme only to wind up getting busted and going to jail at season’s end. season 8 opens with the ownership rights to the trailer park up for grabs after Jim Lahey’s ex-wife, Barb, splits from her current husband, Sam Losco. with Barb and Sam each having 49.5% stake in the park, each of them works to convince Jim to sell his 1% share, to become majority owner. Barb teams up with Julian and Co. while Sam becomes partners with Cyrus, who was a recurring villain in seasons 1, 2, 4, and 5.

in order to come up with the necessary funds to buy out Lahey, Julian opens a strip club that serves free drinks, with donations appreciated. Ricky is still growing dope, and has come up with his own form of currency “hash coins” which he uses to barter with local merchants. he is trying to get back with Lucy, and his daughter, Trinity, is all grown up, and working as a waitress at Julian’s club. Bubbles wants to run an honest business as the proprietor of a bed and breakfast that caters to ppl with cats.

there are 10 episodes total in season 8, and they are all pretty solid. it’s almost like they never missed a beat. I’m really excited to hear there will be a season 9 released on Netflix in March, and rumour has it that they are writing seasons 10 and 11 this month. I wanna mention that I avoided watching the handful of movies they released b/c I was afraid it would dampen my opinion of the show and/or subsequent enthusiasm for the show when it was brought back. I may go back and watch them, but not until after the show has officially wrapped.

netflix: 4/5

imdb: 9/10


Some Shows I Watched

August 5, 2013

High School USA!
the students are studying for the SATs. Cassandra pretends to be Native American. Blackstein pretends to be gay. 1/5


Axe Cop
Axe Cop hosts a 4th of July BBQ, and tells the story of his great-great-great-great grandfather who fought the King of England for possession of the Secret Attack Almanac during the Revolutionary War. 2/5


the President of the Navy (Rob Riggle) is the target of an assassination plot at the commencement ceremony. it’s up to Edroid (Ed Helms) to stop it. 4/5


Childrens Hospital
during a day of sightseeing, Blake’s son is witness to a mob murder. Officer Briggs returns with a new partner, played by Jaleel White. 5/5


new seasons of Squidbillies and Aqua Teen Hunger Force start this coming Sunday!

[adult swim] Pilots: Green Bench vs. Mr. Pickles

July 31, 2013

Green Bench is a 22-minute live-action pilot about a group of friends who squat in a house, with the intentions of renovating, and then flipping it. things get complicated when one of them becomes romantically involved with a homeless woman. Green Bench comes from the internet sketch comedy group of the same name, and seems like it would be adult swim’s Always Sunny or Workaholics type show. 4/5


from Will Carsola and Dave Stewart of Nick Swardson’s Pretend Time, comes Mr. Pickles it’s like Cujo meets Moral Orel. the story of a young boy and his Satanic rapist murderer dog, Mr Pickles. the father is a telemarketer, the mother is voiced by Brooke Shields, and Grandpa is the only one who knows how evil the dog really is. according to the upfront, the network has already picked this up. 3/5


Green Bench gets my vote. it was funnier, with a better story. Mr. Pickles felt like it was violent, just for the sake of being violent. that shit gets old pretty quick. go here to watch and vote.

Alleged Seventh Member Of Ghost Just Some Dude In A Robe Who Enjoys Masturbating To Organ Music

July 29, 2013

once the party crowd had thinned down to the last half-dozen or so, we decided to watch some shows. the season premiere of NTSF:SD:SUV -> the season finale of Venture Bros. -> the season premiere of Childrens Hospital -> Futurama. I’d just like to take this moment to congratulate myself for coming up with that playlist. we ran out of energy, prior to Futurama, so we stopped after Childrens Hospital. Futurama was the show I was least interested in watching, GREAT JOB!

I don’t watch a lot of NTSF:SD:SUV, but this was pretty funny. during a routine prisoner transport, Comic Con’s worst villains get loose on a plane. guest starring Horatio Sanz (Ralphe from The Problem Solverz), Joe Lo Truglio (The State), and a whole bunch of women you probably wouldn’t mind having sex with.


I don’t watch a lot of Venture Bros. either so I’m just going off my limited knowledge of the show and characters. the monarch guy kidnapped the bald guy with the glasses, but then let him go. the boys went to live with their godparents, and find out that they are clones.

Childrens Hospital had a similar theme, as it’s revealed the hospital has been keeping a shit-ton of Dr. Blake Downs clones in their basement. unfortunately, for Steve Agee, the clones keep having accidents. the rest of the hospital staff goes to Japan, while the hospital is sprayed for termites. Jon Hamm (Mad Men) and Keegan-Michael Key (Key & Peele) also guest star.


FOX recently unveiled their late nite animation programming block to go up against [adult swim]. High School USA! is from the mind of Dino Stamatopoulos (Moral Orel, Mary Shelley’s Frankenhole) it’s basically like a bizarro world version of Archie Comics. the first episode (which apparently aired a week early in some markets) dealt with school bullies. the second episode was worse. the story revolved around a girl forwarding pics of a guy’s penis to everyone at school. so in a show of solidarity, all the guys decide to also forward pics of their penises to every girl at school. as a fan of Dino’s previous work, I’m kinda embarrassed at how uninspired and juvenile this was.


Axe Cop wasn’t any better. it’s the show that originally started as a web comic a few years back. it came from the mind of a five-year old, whose 28-year old brother then drew the comics. after a fairly promising first episode, the second episode was just as juvenile as High School USA. a zombie eats the world’s smartest brain, and his poop recruits other zombies to build a giant robot, so he (the poop) can fly to England, marry the queen, and take over the world. Nick Offerman (Parks & Rec) stars as Axe Cop. Ken Marino (The State) is the voice of Axe Cop’s partner, Flute Cop. Nick’s wife in real-life, Megan Mulally (Childrens Hospital) also does voices. I wouldn’t recommend watching either one of these shows, and I’d be willing to bet they’ll be cancelled after their initial runs.


[adult swim] Pilots: King Star King vs. Ubermansion

July 24, 2013

it’s week 2 of [adult swim] summer pilot rollout program, where new shows go head-to-head, in hopes of becoming a full-on series. I didn’t catch the first week’s pilots, but word has it, this week’s are better.

King Star King 3/5
a show about sex, drugs, and rock & roll. King Star King is a punk rocker who does a lot of drugs. he is banished to another realm by the king, after getting caught with his daughter. Tommy Blacha (Metalocalypse) provides the voice of the antagonist, Spring Bunny (in a variation of his Dr. Rockzo voice) and also serves as one of the show’s executive producers. this show reminds me of Superjail.


Ubermansion 4/5
from the guys who brought you Robot Chicken, it’s the story of a group of superheroes who live in a mansion. think of it as a cross between Titan Maximum and Drawn Together. in the pilot episode. they are being audited by the US government. Bryan Cranston supplies the voice of the group’s leader. Titanium Rex. Keegan Michael Key does the voice of the auditor. Robot Chicken regulars, Seth Green and Tom Root, also provide voices.


if I had to pick which one I would rather want to see turned into a series, it would be Ubermansion. King Star King is pretty good, but seems like you need to be fucked out of your gourd, to properly enjoy. go here to watch and vote for the episodes.

Todd & The Book Of Pure Evil (2010)

July 17, 2013

Todd & The Book Of Pure Evil contains some of my favourite things, Canadians, lesbians, and references to metal. the show revolves around four high schoolers who are in search of the book of pure evil.
Todd: stoner who likes metal and wants to fuck Jenny
Curtis: Todd’s best friend, who likes corn chips, and has a prosthetic arm
Jenny: too busy trying to find the book to go to the bone zone with Todd
Hannah: the brains of the group
Atticus Murphy, Jr. is the show’s main antagonist, and my favourite primary character. in addition to being the school guidance counselor, he also works for a Satanic cult.
there’s also Jimmy (Jason Mewes), the school janitor, who gives Todd advice, and three dudes in the school parking lot, who like to fuck with Todd

each episode, the book looks for a student who is down on their luck, and winds up making shit a whole lot worse. the show can best be described as Buffy the Vampire Slayer meets Dazed and Confused meets Tales From the Crypt wrapped inside a GWAR video.

the native rating for this show on imdb is 7.8, which is almost a full point lower than my rating. I assigned a numerical score to each episode between 1-5. three episodes scored a 1, three episodes scored a 2, six episodes scored a 3, seven episodes scored a 4, seven episodes scored a 5.

Season 1:
01 – Todd finds the book, and uses it to become a better guitar player, in hopes of wooing Jenny away from her douchebag boyfriend 4
02 – Hannah creates a homunculus for her science project, that looks like Todd 4
03 – a goth chick has zombie rock stars chained up in her basement 5
04 – a bullied gay student uses the book to turn everyone else gay, turning himself straight, in the process 4
05 – the fattest girl in the school becomes skinny, but the excess fat becomes a monster 4
06 – the slowest kid in school uses the book to create smoke that turns everyone into stoners 4
07 – lesbians…twins…’nuff said 5
08 – a bully with a small penis uses the book to make his dong life-size 3
09 – a girl uses the book to become pregnant, giving birth to a giant baby 1
10 – a basketball player uses the book to improve his game, channeling the ghost of a former player 2
11 – a girl uses the book to improve her singing skills, but backfires…musical episode 2
12 – a genius chess player is convinced that Todd is the pure evil one 4
13 – Curtis uses the book to give himself a new arm 5

Season 2:
01 – senior citizens at the retirement home become zombies 3
02 – a lonely girl uses the book to catch new friends 3
03 – Jenny’s father wakes from his coma, but has a hard time fitting in with the gang 5
04 – cheerleaders transform into roided up juiceheads 3
05 – hippie chick uses the book to make the school go green, which turns everyone into neanderthals, in the process 4
06 – a student uses the book to turn the school into an RPG 5
07 – a chronic masturbater turns himself invisible 1
08 – the a/v club uses the book to trap Todd in a movie 5
09 – a Puritan girl uses a giant cake to steal ppl’s birthdays 2
10 – part two of the musical episode from season 1 1
11 – Todd and Curtis go all American Pie by making a pact to lose their virginity at a house party 3
12 – Todd is transported to a future where Atticus has taken over 3
13 – Todd and Atticus throw down to see who the real pure evil one is 5

the show was cancelled after two seasons, but they are going to make an animated movie (set to come out in 2014) that will serve as the series finale. it’s a good show, even if some of the storylines were really fucking stupid. I AM…NOT A TODDIE! *insert sad trombone here*



Drunk History Series Premiere Review

June 25, 2013

for the uninitiated, Drunk History is a show that got it’s start on Funny Or Die, and will make the jump to Comedy Central next month. the most well-known episode is probably the one where Abraham Lincoln (Will Ferrell) meets Frederick Douglass (Don Cheadle) ppl get drunk, and then recount famous historical events, complete with re-enactments. Entertainment Weekly gave it a pretty good write-up, calling it one of the best new shows of the summer.

the series premiere is currently available on Comedy Central’s web site. just a heads-up, I guess they wanted ppl to enjoy the total viewing experience, so they included the commercial breaks too, hooray!–washington–d-c–season-1-ep-102

Washington, D.C. is the focus of this episode. true DC historians may be disappointed to learn that while the episode is heavy on politics, there is no story about DC’s greatest politician, Marion Barry.

The Watergate Scandal – Bob Woodward and (to a lesser extent) Carl Bernstein uncover the break-in at the Watergate Hotel, that lead to the resignation of President Nixon. the guy telling the story becomes ill, and they incorporate it into the scene, by having Woodward vomit during his meeting with “Deep Throat” Nathan Fielder as Bob Woodward; Bob Odenkirk as President Nixon; Fred Willard as “Deep Throat”

Lincoln Assassination – this was the most informative story in the episode, b/c I didn’t know John Wilkes Booth had a brother, much less that they had a sibling rivalry. I think I saw Maya Rudolph sitting behind Lincoln. Adam Scott as John Wilkes Booth; Will Forte as Edwin Booth; Stephen Merchant as Abraham Lincoln

Elvis Meets Nixon – this is the story of when President Nixon made Elvis Presley an honourary federal agent. Elvis later arrests a guy for stealing some jewelry from him, only to let him go, and Elvis also gives him $200. this was my personal favourite of the three. Jack Black as Elvis Presley; Dave Grohl as a member of the Memphis Mafia; Jack McBrayer as Nixon aide; Bob Odenkirk reprises his role as President Nixon

series creator, Derek Waters, makes a cameo appearance in each vignette.

I enjoyed the first episode, and look forward to seeing the other seven episodes. Drunk History premieres July 9 at 10 PM.

netflix: 4/5

imdb: 8/10


Can’t Talk Right Now, I’m Watching My Little Pony

April 2, 2012

My Little Pony
when Rainbow Dash’s former lover pays a visit to that place where all the ponies live, Pinkie Pie puts her plastic cock-blocking skills to good use. u watch Pinkie Pie chasing Rainbow Dash, and it’s like Pepe Le Pew chasing that cat that had a painted stripe, to make her look like a skunk. after watching this episode, I became a full-on My Little Brony!


I don’t wanna go into too much detail about this episode, other than to say it kinda felt like a series finale. even tho it wasn’t even a season finale. if u look at PFFR’s track record, a three-season show would be par for the course. it’s best to go out while you’re on top, and this was the best season to date! there is a reunion episode/season finale this Thursday nite.


Check It Out
Dr. Steve Brule explores Pleasure. he goes to the candy store, where he breaks his teeth on a lollipop. he goes to the county fair, where he breaks his nose on a roller coaster. he goes to a bath house, where he may have been violated. he eats a mystical root, which causes him to freak out.


South Park
cat-breading becomes the hot new meme, and everyone now thinks cats have evolved to the intelligence level of humans. Cartman struggles to keep the art of Faith Hilling relevant.

South Park

Ugly Americans
Twayne quits when Mark’s comedy roast of him goes too far. Mark takes over, and immediately runs into problems, when he shuts down the Department of Birthdays.

Ugly Americans

American Dad
trading places episode where Jeff and Haley become the heads of household, and Stan and Francine live on a minimum-wage salary for a month; Roger and Steve test drive the car of their dreams.

Bob’s Burgers
Bob gets a new ice cream machine; Linda teaches the kids synchronized swimming class.

Mary Shelley’s Frankenhole
Victor builds a robot, so he can see what he really looks like, and doesn’t like the results.

we also watched three episodes of Robot Chicken. my average score was 6-6-6 (one 6, two 7s)

we’ve come to the end of an era. with my departure to set up operations on the west coast, I will no longer be frequenting the House of MagicMist. it’s been a good run…

XianZ: +10
netflix: 5/5
imdb: 10/10

‘Cuz 12 Out Of 13 Ain’t Bad

March 29, 2012

we had so much shit to watch last week, that we spread it out over two nites. 13 shows in all, 12 of which were good. I won’t factor the terrible show into my ratings, b/c it was a one-off. for those of u keeping score, hipsterscum only watched South Park.

Odd Job Jack – animated show from Cananaduh about a guy who bounces around from job to job. the episode we watched had him working for his mother at an ad agency. saw Tom Arnold in the opening credits, knew it was gonna suck ass…I was right! Wrath didn’t like the animation, vowed to never watch another episode.

Mary Shelley’s Frankenhole – Hyralius, the monster who likes making jokes about Asian stereotypes runs amok. Ken Jeong (Hangover) supplies the voices of all the characters.


The Simpsons – everyone at the plant is replaced by robots (voiced by Data from Star Trek: The Next Generation) the robots eventually turn on mankind, when Homer reprograms them to kill

Check It Out – season 2 premiere has Dr. Steve Brule exploring the world of Boats. this bit was made even funnier, by Steve’s constant vomiting. Ronnie Rodriguez (known as the world’s best Johnny Depp impersonator) makes a guest appearance as Captain Jack Sparrow.

Check It Out

Family Guy – Stewie conducts an experiment to see if Brian and Peter would actually be friends, if they didn’t live together.

American Dad – Stan’s painful childhood memories prevent him from giving up on Steve’s puppy, after it is crushed by a hot air balloon full of pirate cats.

Cleveland Show – Cleveland’s attempts to bond with his father, are derailed by Junior’s ability to correctly pick college basketball winners. this rift causes Cleveland to join up with his father’s rival in a father-son golf tournament

Archer – Season 3 finale guest starring Bryan Cranston (Breaking Bad) as the leader of mutineers aboard the international space station. ISIS is in dire need of a captain, after Cyril accidentally kills the only man capable of flying the ship back to Earth.


Unsupervised – Gary and Joel feel discriminated against, when the school refuses to let them donate blood. the Principal and baseball coach change their mind, thinking younger blood will help revitalize them. the no-prize here was that they were too stupid to bother to check if Gary and Joel had acceptable blood types.

Bob’s Burgers – Bob and Linda attempt to capitalize on the free advertising, while there’s a bank robbery going on across the street.

Delocated – TB is disgusted when he finds out his mom is dating The Glaze; Jon dates a Chinese woman, who turns out to be Korean.


South Park – Stan’s uncle pays $6000 for a bolo tie, causing the boys to take up a crusade against the home shopping networks.

South Park

Ugly Americans – Mark switches teams in the company football game, after Randall replaces him at work; Callie pimps Leonard, so she can get a sweet new ride.

Ugly Americans

XianZ: +8
netflix: 4/5
imdb: 9/10